I. What My Mother Said
Mary had
seven little lambs,
and their fleece was red
as the desert sands.
Cinderella went
to the ball in cleats,
and her fairy sent
seven parakeets.
Antony
said to his (eleven) men,
"I'll give you (ten minus) ten
fine golden (Cleopa-) trays
for each ship (that has been) razed."
And the lion swore
to the nibbling mouse,
"If you pull this thorn,
you can have my house."
Peter Pan went home
with his friend the gnome,
and her shiny blouse -
it was made of chrome.
Aladdin
went to the (dumb asses') fair.
When he was (loitering) there,
up popped a (Freudian) stalk
made up of (edible) chalk.
Blue Tea Hen Low
Blue Tea Hen Low
Blue. Tea Hen Low
Blue tea hen low…
These are tales
that I learned in youth.
Never say they pale
next to tenured Truth.
For my mother said,
"If you stitch the i's
with a silken thread,
you will win a prize."
And they say:
"Give Truth a (habit of) verse
and it will (bitterly) curse.
Give bullshit (a second) chance
and it will (begin to) dance."
Blue Tea Hen Low
Blue Tea Hen Low
Blue tea hen low?
"Beauty's hollow…
…to the marrow!"
Beauty's hollow to the marrow.
Beauty's hollow to the marrow.
(That's what mother said.)
II. Some Things That I Have
I've a friend
you'd be pleased to know
from around the globe.
Won't you say hello?
He's a man of worth
in his native town,
where he dons a robe
and he wears a crown.
And he says:
"You're town's a (barrel of) gas.
I like the (receding) grass!
The men are (just short of) fine,
the kids in (a jagged) line."
I've a poem
you might like to read.
You should hear it first -
then your eyes won't bleed.
And it goes like this
and it goes like that.
It was unrehearsed
in a sort of scat.
Listen up:
"You're of a (remitted) green.
I like your (metallic) sheen.
Let's have a (romantic) twist
straight down your (unraveled) list."
Shoo Bee Do Wow
Shoo Bee Do Wow
Shoo Bee Do Wow
Shoo bee do wow…
I've a dream
I should tell you now.
There was once in Spain
an unwilling cow -
or a bull, he was.
Ferdinand, by name.
He was unrestrained,
yet they found him tame.
And he said,
"Matadors, (I tell you) no!
Please let me (go where I'd) go.
But if you (so rudely) fret,
I'll be your (unwilling) pet."
Shoo Bee Do Wow
Shoo Bee Do Wow
Shoo bee do wow?
"Shoes, beetle out…
…then we'll stroll out."
Shoes, beetle out - then we'll stroll out.
Shoes, beetle out - then we'll stroll out.
(That's not all I have.)
[Previous: Suddenly]
[Next: Asshole]
[Molly's Song (and Other Poems) homepage]